Monday, January 9, 2012
Full of Butterflies
In a few days I will be doing something I have never done before.
I will be saying things "out loud" that have only been running around in my head.
It is a leap of faith for sure.
I find that the one butterfly that quietly resides inside has birthed multiple caterpillars who are bursting out of there cocoons and into flight, seeking a way out.
Butterflies when released haphazardly can cause a lot of damage.
Instead of appearing beautiful with fluttery gentleness,
they look like they are running into clear glass trying to find a way of escape.
Hence, my little colony within.
My flinch when I feel anxious is to
a) find a secluded corner, never to be seen again or
b) high-tail it as fast as I can for the hills.
Neither of these are real options if I want to stay relevant in God's kingdom.
So what can I do?
The butterflies(anxiety) exist, I can't ignore it.
My only option is moving forward, butterflies and all.
I will be honest, I have a bit of a process that I use that so far has worked for me.
I never realized that I go through the same steps each time I find myself dealing with anxiety.
I like to call it "active meditation"
First, I listen to truths about God. I have made up a play-list for my ipod of meditation type songs. All the songs are scripture based. This puts me in a place to sit at the feet of my Abba Father.
Second, I have a conversation with my Abba Father, who knows me better than anyone. This could be an all day affair and often includes fasting.
Third, I soak myself in His Word. I read stories in the Bible of God's presence in the lives of His people, of the hard places they found themselves and how God walked with them there.
He is so good!
I am in the middle of this "active meditation" and will stay here until I have finished this task that God has set before me to do.
What are some ways that you deal with anxiety? I would love to hear from you!